After years ( 16 to be exact) of my daughter asking for a dog daily, I caved. As the house became emptier in the fall of 2019, I was feeling a bit lonely. My oldest son was away at university, my daughter gaining more independence in her grade 12 year and my husband taking on a position coaching hockey, I found myself at home alone more often then normal. Schedules have changed and mine seemed to have some large gaps. So why not get a dog to keep me company. Here is the story of our foster fail.
Let’s Foster a Puppy
I will never forget the excitement in my daughter’s face and the look of WTF?? on my husband’s, when I mentioned the idea of fostering a puppy. Fostering a puppy would be a great way of getting our feet wet, sorta speak. We can ‘test’ drive a puppy to see if it works with our daytime schedules. Well, my husband thought I was going crazy and my daughter thought the same but didn’t care..She was getting a dog FINALLY!! Now don’t get too excited, I said..If it doesn’t work, we will not be adopting the dog. (Yeah, right!!)
What does the term aging mean to you? Or how is aging in the 21st century (after 2000) different then how our mothers and grand mothers aged? With turning 50 this year, I have been thinking about this lately. I have been reading and listening to midlife women across the globe discuss their experiences. And here is what I have found about aging in the 21st century.
Have you ever revealed your age and then had someone say ‘wow, you look good..for your age.’ What exactly does that mean? Do you ever say to a 25 year old, you look good for your age? Why do people assume that once we reach a certain age that is associated with how you look. I mean, I don’t feel my age (most days). I just live my life and maybe there are days I am tired and look tired and other days I am bright eyed and bushy tailed and might look refreshed. Either way, I am looking my age.
Lately I have watched and listened to a panels of midlife women discuss the topic of how we as women age and how it is perceived. They mentioned words or phrases of aging gracefully, anti-aging, mature woman . Mature as opposed to immature? Doesn’t anti-aging mean we are against or opposed to aging. Well I guess we can be against it, but we can’t stop it. Like it or not we all age and it can’t be stopped…That is life.
And what exactly does aging gracefully mean..It is not like we try to age ungracefully. I remember one woman say in the panel saying “ROCK IT, DON’T ERASE IT!” I love this saying because it means we can’t just erase the last 50+ years because it have brought us to where we are today. Now don’t get me wrong, I am not closing the door on blotting out a few wrinkles here and there or dying the grey in my hair every few months. But doing those things should not define my aging process or erase it or determine if I am aging gracefully.
Are We Invisible?
There are discussions that once women turn 50, we become invisible. It’s like 50 is this magic number when IT all changes. Companies who are marketing products and services seem to miss out on this midlife demographic. According to the ladies at Grace Creative, we are the demographic that companies seem to be missing out the most on. We are the ones with the more disposal income now that our kids are older and we have become more established. Yet companies still market the fun and exciting things to the ‘millenials’. And we get anti-aging cream, incontinence pads and reading glasses (well, you can get some pretty funky reading glasses). We are at a time in our lives where we now have the time and money and want to enjoy it and companies really should realize that. I sometimes feel like Julia Roberts in Pretty Women, when she tries to go shopping but no one in the boutique will help her because of how she looks. And then she goes back after with all her bags of shopping and tells them what a mistake it is…BIG MISTAKE!!
How did our Mothers and Grandmothers age?
To be honest, I don’t know how my mother or grandmother felt as they the aged. I am not sure if they felt strongly about anti-aging or if aging was just part of life for them and they just kept silent. I mean the thought of the finding the fountain of youth has been around forever. So i am sure they were looking for it too. But today, the call to stay youthful is louder. On average women are living longer. Depending on where you live, the average age of life expectancy is 81. Where as the average age in the 1970’s was 70. We can really attribute that to advances in medicine and in gaining knowledge in he benefits of good nutrition and exercise. There are some great role models who led the charge in aging from this generation. Jamie Lee Curtis comes to mind and so does Sophia Loren. But there is a whole list of women in there 70’s with ‘mojo and moxie’. Tina Turner, Diana Ross, Sharon Stone, Meryl Streep, etc, etc……
So as I go forward, this is continues to be such an interesting concept to me. Aging in the 21st century. How do we now define it? I will refer back to the ladies at Grace Creative – #ageisnotjustanumber. It is a mindset and how you, yourself look at it. I definitely do not feel like I am almost 50 and I really don’t want people to judge me because I am 50 or 60 and beyond.
As our tagline suggests, we have gained the wit and wisdom in our established life and continue to do so.
Podcasts, the modern day radio shows, are all the rage right now. For those of you who do not know what a podcast is, they are a digital audio file. Basically like a talk show that is recorded. And then the podcast is made available on the internet for you to download to your mobile device and listen to at your convenience. I like to listen to them while walking, or while I am cleaning the house or in bed before I go to sleep. If you are wanting to learn or about anything, and I mean anything, there is a podcast for it. Here are some of our top podcasts for midlife women.
Well, I am not too sure what can be said about the last year. Unexpected for sure. 2020 was supposed to be a BIG year. And why not, it is 2020. That just has just a ring to it, doesn’t it. The year 2020 is going to bring great things, everyone said. Well I am going to say ‘out with the old and in with the new’. 2021 is going to bring great things. They say that out of the ashes a phoenix will rise.
2021 is going to be a great year and I am going to tell you why. We (Christine and I) will be celebrating a milestone this year. Yes our blog will be 3 years old..but we will also be turning 50! Yep, we are going to be 50 bitches. Oh I missed a punctation.
We are going to be 50, Bitches!!
Turning 50, you can wallow in the thought of being 50 or you can choose to celebrate it.
How do I Celebrate?
Well, I am choosing to celebrate it! I am not to sure how. Got any ideas? Do I start a bucket list of things I haven’t done in life but what to do? I can’t say that I would have a big list as I do not regret or feel like I am missing out on anything. Maybe once a month I celebrate me in some way. Twelve small celebrations instead of one big one..Hmm..Will have to stay tuned for the celebration, what ever that maybe.
What Turning 50 Means to Me
I learned a lot about myself in my 40’s (you can read about that here – Reflecting on my 40’s). So I am looking forward to my journey in my 50’s What will I learn about myself this decade? I do know that 50 is just a number. I do not feel like I am turning 50 except for the occasional episode of symptoms due to perimenopause.
Being 50 in 2021 is very different then being 50 in say, 1985. We know more about aging . We have learned that being active, eating healthier makes a difference. There are more products and services on the market to keep our skin and bodies looking and feeling 10 years younger then we are. We dye our hair more to cover that gray. Which reminds me, I am in a definite need of a root touch up ;).
We also know now about the self journey we are embarking on. As Oprah once said ‘what I know for sure about turning 50 is now I can breath. If you just keep breathing, you can not be conquered’.
Maya Angelou said ‘ the 50’s represent everything you were meant to be’.
So for the year 2021..Out with the Old and In with the New.